Passportu passportu nuvvenduku raaledammaa...?

Passportu passportu nuvvenduku raaledammaa ?
A. Naku chadavadam raadu B. Naku raayadam raadu
C. Naku chadivinchadam raadu D. Naku raayinchadam raadu


Prologue

Manager: babu devi…. Naakosaari nee passport no. kaavalammaa…
Devi: Neeku teleedemo mari… naaku passport ledu.
Manager: Haaa..? Ledaaaa…. :O hmm ponile nee PAN card no. ivvu
Devi: Neekidi kuda teleedaa… naakadi kuda ledu.
Manager: (avaakkayyi…) So… I guess you must be having your driving license atleast….would you mind sharing…
Devi: (Bande unte bussendukani….) Of course I know driving but…. I never thought I would require a license to drive…u know… I am just content with my license to kill.
Manager ki mantaputti: Are “YOU” khiddhing meee…. :X ???
Devi: Maranduke…. Indaaka nunchi ooo tega numberladigestunnavu enti sangathi… kompateesi naa performance ki bokka borla padipoyi… nannemanna phoren pampinche phrograam petteskuntunnava….(kannukoduthu adiga…)
Manager: Manakantha ledu….
Devi:Manasulo…( Hammani… gaalanthaa teesesaadedava)
Manager: Mana devudiki ante mana client gaadiki resources ni unique ga identify chese Personal Identification Number (PIN) laantidi kaavalantenu….
Devi: Osssss inthenaaa… naa daggaro brahmaandamaina idea undi…naa fone no. raaskomanu.
Manager: iddarni gouravanga goyyi teesi kappettestaadu.
Devi: (eedenti what an idea sirji anukuntaadanukunte..) Sarle Maremcheddamantaavu ?
Manager: Urgent ga anni apply chesko…. Aina neekivemi lekundaa payroll meeda ela pettukunnaru…hmmm
( mellaga sannai nokkulu nokkutunnaadu..)
Devi: Hussssssssssshhhhhhhhhuuuu….. sshhhhhhhu….
Manager: Mari apply cheskovalsindi kadaa… ippudu husshoo anukunte passportu pan card vastaaya ?

Devi….(oho...cha alagaa….…)

Devi: Sare aite apply cheskuntaan gaani… monna project party ki pub kelinappudu nuvvu evarevarni ekkadekkada gillavo….
Manager: Hussssssssssshooooooooo….husssshhhhuu…
Devi: Mari gillakunda undaalsindi kada….ippudu husshoo anukunte avanni mee intlo teleekunda untaaya ?
(Manager…chethulu jodisthu kallu mooskuni tala dinchukunnadu)
Devi: Cha…. Nuvvu gilleyyachu gaani mem husshoo anakudada…
Manager: Vadilevayya naayana… naa bangaru konda kadu. Indaakedo foreign program antunnavu… vellalanundaa ? mari cheppachkada innallu…. Neeku baaga mohamaatamekkuavayya devi.
Devi: Hmm… neeku chethivaatamekkuva…
Manager: adigo malla…. Hussshhhhoooo……

Idi o samvatsaram kindati maata… naachetha passport ki apply cheyyinchadaaniki poonukuni vaadi kompaki nippantinchukunentha pani chesaadu mavodu.

Deenikanna mundu nenu chaduvukunetappudu maa collegollu kuda try chesaaru. Palana vaaram post officollu vastaaru… meerandaru enchakka passport ki apply cheskovachu, easy ga vachestundi ani. Appudu nenu… ”Haahhahahahaha….. pichollu passport perutho naa daggaranunchi veyyarupaayalu dobbeddamane…nenemanna GRE aspirant anukunnara ? aina amerika afrika vellalante passport kaavali gaani subbaranga india lo unde vaadni naakenduku ? Poni anthaga kaavalanukunte abroad velletappude apply cheskuntaanu…. Indulo emundi MP seat aa ? MLA ticket aa ? pedda criminal background kuda akkarleddu deeniki …passporte kada… ” ila anukodame kaakundaa migatha apply chestunna vaallandarni chusi electionlalo votlesevaallani chusi navvukunnantha navvukunnanu.

Ee madhya obama kuda amerika nunchi manollandarni tolestunnadu…so passportla daggara raddi taggundochu.. inkaa evevo anukuni…Mothaaniki internal sketchokati vesi… ikkada maa aamchi Mumbai nunchi passport ki apply cheddamani decide ayyanu.

Website lo chusthe identity proof, address proof unte chaalu annattu rasaadu. (ohh… idintha veeji aa anukuni) gabaalni online lone apply chesesaanu. Application submit cheyyadaaniki aa mannaadu 10:15 am ki thane passport office ki ramannaadu. Manaki eppudu ilaanti crunch situations lo edurayye addankulanni eduroddesi correct ga 10 kalla vellipoyaanu. Passport office board kanipistundi daani venaka background lo moodu anakondaalu saagadeesi antinchesi melikalu tippesinattu Queue okati undi. “Vaarni…Bhaaraddesaaniki svatantram vachi 62 yellayyindi inka paapam ee janaalandariki internet ani okatundani… andulo passport ki apply cheskovachani…. Appudu queue emi lekunda direct ga counter daggaraki vellochani(website lo rasadandi babu… kaavalante chuskondi) teleeka agnanam tho aapa sopaalu padutunnaree…..hatha vidhi “anukunnanu. Kaasepu chinthinchi ala aa queue chivarakara unna master daggarakelli…

Nenu:Saar naaku 10:15 ki appointment undi. Ye counter ki vellali ?
Mastaru:Naaaaakkuda 10:15 ke appointment undamma…. Nenu anduke ee queue lo nunchunnanu.
Nenu:Saar meeru porabadutunnaru…nenu ONLINE lo apply chesanu. So nenu queue lo undakkarledu.(bhujaalu paikegaresthu cheppanu.)
Mastaru: Baabu…. Nenu kuda ONLINE lone apply chesaanu… idigo chudu naa appointment time (ani application chupinchaadu)
Andulo naalage same-to-same, ditto application prathi page sidelo 10:15 am ani undi.

Inthalo maa mundarunna head mastaru kuda kalpinchukuni tana application meedunna 10:15 am kuda chupinchaadu.

Saar … ante idanthaaaaaaaa……antu konchem kallu tirugutunnattu unte aayana pattukuni.
Avunamma idanthaaaaaaaaaaaaa………………….. ade

Saar cinemaallo chupisthe ento anukunna gaani nijamgaane inthapedda line untundanukoledu.
Andukenamma mee generation vallandaru eppudu internettu orkuttu chatting cinemaale kaakunda BAYATA PRAPANCHAM kuda chudaali. Appudappudu ila passport officelaki police stationlaki tirugutundaali.
Aa last line loni satire inko rendu vaaraallo ardham avutundani naakappudu teleedu.

Paddhati ga ala queue lone nunchuni 10 am kellinavaadni 3:00pm kalla counter daggarakelli, vaadiki naa documents submit chesesaanu. Nijaaniki naa daggara residence proof kinda maa company letter tappinchi inkemi ledu.Andukenemo Vaado vankara chupu chusi… fees pakka counterlo kattey annadu.
Naa daggaremo DD undi. Aa DD ye papam aa madam ki ichesaanu. Aavida malli daanni madatha petti naakichesaaru. Cashu annattu saiga chesaaru… ventane pakka building ki parigetti atm lonchi dabbulu teesi malla venakki parigetti aa madam ki cash chethilo pettanu sunaayaasamga.
Adgadi… akkaditho naa application adhyayam poorthayyindi.

Moodu vaaralayyindi…. Police verification ki inka ye bhatudu, bakasurudu raaledu. Naake kangaarochi office nunchi saayantram tinnaga police station ki vellipoyaanu. Naa letha vayasulo ade first time police station ki velladam. O saar ni kalisi adigithe… babu station ki raavadaaniki nuvvu padda tapana harshinchadagindi… kaani neeku ikkada nunchi mundu o letter vastundi appudu gaani nuvvee daridaapullo kanipinchaku… naa menalludu laantodivi…. Enduku cheptunnano ardham chesko… anesaaru. Abbhaa… ila alludu sentiment tho kottarentandi babu …hrudayam baruvekki inka akkada nunchi vachesaanu.

Daaranthaa kuda naa sixth sense aa letter ee paatiki mana building kinda unde rekula dabba lo eppudo padesi untadu, padesi untadu, padesi untadu, padesi untadu ani ambulance siren laaga ukkiribikkiri chesesindi. Maa rekula dabba speciality entante…andulo letters veyyagalam gaani tiyyalem. Sarigga post box lo elagaithe manam letters veyyagalam kaani postman okkade avi tiyyagalado… alaanti hyper secure design daandi. Anduke eppudu adi letters tho nindipotuntundi. Aa taravatha konnaallaki daanni evadanna clear chestaado mari em jarugutundo teleedu gaani antha khaali ai kanipistundi. Naakanthaga letters emi intiki raavu kaabatti neneppudu daani mystery ni study cheyyaledu.
Kaani eeroju tappadu.

Ground floor lo aa dabbaani kadipi kudipi kinda padesi tokki.. daaniki sottalu petti.. raka rakaala angles lonchi cheyyi pettadaaniki try chesi o araganta paatu orangutan laaga chaala circus feats chesaanu. Aakhariki aayasamochi maa flat ki vachesaanu. Chustunu gadaa… geda meeda o letter petti undi. Colombus ki amerika kanipinchinappudu ela feel ayyuntaado anthakanna ekkuva feel ayyanu.

Ventane aa letter maa pakkane unde cyber café vaadiki chupinchaanu… adi motham Marathi lo undi.
Vaadu daanni just ala chusi…”passport ki apply chesaara… o aidondalu teeskuni police station ki vellandi” annadu. Marandulo telephone billu, insurance policy, electricity billu ilaantivevo adiginattunnadu..
Mee daggaravanni unnayaa ?
Levu
Maranaduke aidondalu…
Unte
Rendondale…

Abbo…. Ee service charges anni veediki bhale telse anukuni Saturday station ki velladaamani decide ayyanu.


Round-1 (tingtingting)

Sir nenu passport kosam apply cheskunnanu… so meeru konchem verification ….
Dishu dishu hmm…. Aa documents chupinchu…
Sir actual ga maadi AP nenu last one and half year nunchi ikkaduntunnanu…
Enti ee documents anni AP ani unnayi…. Huh…. AP pampinchenaa ? pampinchenaa ? (dishu dishu)
Saar saar please…
Dishu dishu dishu
Sare nee daggara unna documents anni ila teeskura…
Ippudu ivanni teeskelli o S.E.O chetha attest cheyyinchi teeskura… dishu…. Vellu

Result 0-1

Hmm …dead man don’t demand dowry anukuni aa documents anni teeskuni station nunchi bayataki vachanu. Raadam aithe vachanu gaani ippudu attestation cheyyinchadam ela… naa daggara anni Xerox copies unnayi… originals untene gaani pani jaragadu. Sarle vasudevudi laaga…. evaranna dorikithe godaari daateddaamanukunna. Elagola maa colleagues apartments lo unde oka retired advocate kaallu vellu pattukuni mothaaniki documents attestation cheyyinchukunna. (ee taathagaaru matladithe “na fawar poddi”…”naa fawarooo poddi”…” naa fawar poddayyaa baabu”…anukuntu aayanaki ee vayasulo kuda entha powerundo naaku chupinchaaru. )

Avanni teeskuni rendo Saturday malla station ki vellanu.

Round-2 (tingtingting)

Sir….
Dishu dishu…. Documents anni teeskochaava…?
Aa teeskochaanu sir.
Dishu… sarigga vinu “ANNI” teeskochaava ?
Anni teeskochesaanu sir…. (appude ardham cheskovalsindi “ANNI” ante “anneeee ….“ani)
Dishu… enti only rent agreement unda…aithe kudardu.
Sir..sir
Dishu…dishu.


Result 0-2

Konnaalla tarvatha o roju nenu office ki late ga bayalderutunte maa inti eduruga unde mandula shop daggara kanipinchaadu. Nannu chusi kuda edo fone ki disease diagnose chestunnattu fone ni atu itu tipputu paina kinda chustunnadu. Nene aayana daggaraki vellanu.

Sir… please sir naa daggara ikkada one year nunchi unnattu proof undi. Konchem chudandi sir.
Hmm…. Em chaduvukunnavu ?
Hamma konchem daarloki vastunnattunnadu…. BTech sir.
Hmm…. Em chadivistaavu ?
Aaa…???
Nee pani chesthe em chadivistaavu antunnanu…..
Sir oo aidondalu…
Hmm…. Sare Saturday station ki ra.

Round-3 (tingtingting)

Sir… naa documents.
Nee file passport office ki pampinchesamayya… ippudu documents unna em cheyyalem.

Neeku passport raadu. DISHU. (knocked-out).

Konchem terukunnaka… sir please sir , please sir please…
Igo…. Nee gurinchi process aagadayya nee file malla passport office ki pampinchesaamu… malla passport officekelli malla verification kosam apply chesko.. appudu chuddam. Dissshhuuum.

Result: The battle continues…

Aa roju … vaadni , vaadiki atu edu taraalni itu edu taraalni arundhati cinemalo villain gaadni chitakottesi paathipettisinattu paathi pettalanipinchindi.

Epilogue

Nijaaniki passport avasaram naakippudu ledu. I just took it up as a social experiment to see how it feels like to be completely on your own in this world. It’s miserable. It makes you question your values…contradict your beliefs…doubt your abilities and test your patience to such an extent that you almost lose faith in your SELF.

By the way… the whole thing…It’s a life sucking experience.

P.S: God save the system !

Vedi Devi

Mangalavaaram…

Innallu pandem kodini mepinattu mammalnandarini mepini maa client nunchi o sandesam. O naa priyaathipriyamaina nestaallaara naakee madhya chillara kharchulu ekkavayyayanipistundi. Ika nunchi meeku munupatilaaga jeedi pappu baadam pappu pettalenu. Prastutam naa sontha paadi gedalaki daana veyyadame chaala kastamga maarindi. Meerandaru veerulu soorulu kaabatti pandela kellinappudu leda pakkodni gilletappudu panikostaaru. Prastuta prapancha aardhika parinamaalanu drusthi lo pettukuni pandem kollakanna paaliche gedale nayamani meryill lynch morgan Stanley paalerlu chepparu.Anduvalla mimmalni chaala baadha tho dooram cheskovalsi vastundi.

Ante mammalnandarni maa project nunchi roll-off chesaadu…anaga s/w basha lo project scrap ayyindi.kaani naa tokkalo kopam deenikkadu… ma TL @^%#$*& gaadu innallu naa chetha edava panantha cheyyinchaadu. Nenu chesanu… moraayistune. Ippudu vere daaniki vere daanni ekkuva protsahistunnadu. Idi naa avagaahana. Veedi bias feeling naaku manta puttistundi. Chamuru baavulu australia adavulu kanna chaala ekkuva mandipotundi lopala. Deenne “kopam” leda aagraham antarani ekado chadivanu. Kaani naa manta ikkade start avvaledu… idi just agni ki aajyam posinattannamaata….

Konchem opigga moodrojulu rewind chesthe…. Aadivaram. Senivaram raathri maa colleagues room lo padukunnanu. Gatha konni weekends nunchi alaage chestunnanu. Aadivaram matuku poddunne 9 aa prantam lo maa room ki cherukuntaanu. Ee aadivaaram kuda alaage anukuni bayalu deranu… maa intikochi chusthe… o pedda taatikaayantha taalam kappa vesundi. Daani chevi naa daggara ledu. Asale poddune evevo prakruthi panulu prarambhostavaalu untaayi kaabatti konchem ibbandanipinchindi. Ventane konchem kopam vachela unnattu tochi…. Maa roomie ki fone chesaanu…”era babu ekkadunnavu…?”… “nenu office lo unnanu…” avatala nunchi samadhanam. Ippatiki naa kopam feeling ekkuvayyindi. “sare mari padankelu lekkepette lopala vachestaava ?” – ante kopam vachinappudu manasulo padankelu lekkapettamantaaru kada. Vaadelaagu raaledu office ikkadnunchi 10kms. Nenu paachi moham tho chediripoyina juttu tho alaage bussekki office kelli taalam chevi teeskunnanu. Bus lo unnantha sepu kuda kopame…. Veedu velletappudu fone chesi vellachu kada…asalemanukunnadu. Naa kopam ala eppatikappudu daanitho daanne into kottukuntu chaala perigipotune undi. Endukante ma proj vallu aa Sunday Mumbai tirige trippokati plan chesaru.
Oka barbarian laaga office lo adugupettesariki maa colleague fone… enti ready ayyava ? vastunnava ani. Aa time ki naa daggara maa room taalam chevokkatte undi. Brushu, paste, em levu. Trip nenu cancel chesukuni subbaranga intikellundachu kaani eppudu maa team lo andarni… peoples initiatives teeskondra morro ani tega visiginchestuntaanu. asale manaki edava principles okati, lead by example etc etc edo feelavutuntaanu. So office lone konchem fresh up ayyanu. Maa roomie gaadikkuda kopam konchem ruchi chupiddamani trip ki bayalderaanu.

Velledi sidhivinayak temple, mahalkshmi temple, haji ali darga. Punyakshetraalu… manademo paapistodi avataaram. Aina sare bhaktha kannappa type lo manasu svacham gaa undaali gaani manimaanikyalendukanukuni nannu nenu samadhanaparchukuni samardhinchukunnanu. Dadar station lo digaamu. Ala bayatakochi etu vellala ani anukuntunte… o polisodokadu kanipinchaadu. Maa colleague athani daggarakelli ‘sir ikkada sidhivinayak temple ki etu vellali?’ anadigaadu. Vaadu jarda packet chimpukuni notlo veskuntu… itepellali annattu saiga chesaadu. Maa colleague malla vaadine… sir naduchukuntu velthe entha time lo veltaamu? Anadigaadu. Neekanni kanukkuni cheppala ? asala nuvvevadivi ? itepellalannanu kada…. Godavapettukodaaniki ready ga unnadu. Maavodni ala pakkaki tappinchaamu. Ikkada malla naa tank lo petrol padindi. Vaadikendukantha kopam, pogaru, asahanam. Adigindi just daari…dabbulu kaadu. Desa seva chesevaadni ala praja seva koresariki vaadni avamaninchamanukunnada. Naaku matuku lopala circuitlanni kaalipotunnayi. Vaadi chethilo adhikaram undi society lo chaala important and responsible position lo unnadu. Ilagena chesedi. Vaadi paristhitento vaadendukala react ayyado teleedu gaani lopala lopale naaku chirethukochesindi.

Sidhivinayak temple daggarakochaam. Adi chaala famous temple anta… enduko mari naakkuda teleedu. Asala specific ga kontha mandi devullane konni chotla chaala famous cheyyadaaniki venakaala bhayamkaramaina scam emanna undaa ane type lo alochanalu veltunnayi. Inthalo evado cheppadu ikkadiki movie stars ekkuva vastuntaaru amitabh salman etc etc ani. Ponlera babu anukunnanu. Kaani naa alochanalinkaa aagaledu. Asala mana tirupathendukantha famous ? poni palana gudi edaina sare akkada devudu adaggaane korikalu teerchestuntaada ? metal detectors lonchi ala lopalikellamo ledo. Boldanni maanava haraalu. Ante okko prasadam amme shop ni mugguresi chuskuntunnaru. Janalni ala puchukuni tosestunnaru akkada cheppulu pettandi prasadam teeskondi ani.30rs 100rs 150rs trays ammutunnaru rendartipallu chamanthi poolu agarathulu petti. Chaala chendalamaina vyaparam ga anipinchindi. Ento devudi daggara ila raayadam naaku chaala ado rakanga unna… akkada jarigedi adi. ”ganda danda”.

Devudni gullo petti…. Galla petti nimpukovadame. Nenu mare negative ga rastunnanani kaadu gaani aa place antha alaage undi. Punyam paramardham kosam bhakthulaki saayam cheyyalane uddesam tho matuku akkadevaru vyaparam cheyyatledu. Ante mari akkadikoche vaallu bhakthulu ani naa assumption. So idantha chusi malla ala dochukune manushula meeda kopam. Malla ikkada kuda ee category lo kopam ide first time kaadu. Dochukune vyaparam naaku avagaahanochi first chusindi Hyderabad lo. Hitec city to JNTU autollo. RTC bus ticket 5rs. Kaani auto vaallu teeskunedi 15-20 madhyalo untundi. Meter vesi dochukunnadante konchem trupthi untundi kaani vaadu direct ga dochukuntaadu. Mari vaadanthala dochukodaaniki kaaranam ?...... aa routelo ekkuva velledi s/w engineers. Eppudoo okadu officekelle tondarlo ee auto vaadenthadigithe anthivvadaaniki oppukuni appatnunchi migatha vallandariki ala alavaatu chesaadu. Mari poni ee autovaallanna sare konchem sadhrudayam tho enthavuddo anthe teeskochu kada… abbe adi jaragani pani. Evadanna Punjabi odu telugu raanodu dorikithe vaadikkuda aavadam baaga raastaaru. Idi one side of the coin. Ade routelo roaddese vaallu construction workers (roju coolie ki pani chese)kuda veltuntaaru. Mana ee palana s/w engineers chethi vaataniki saripadela vaalla daggara dabbundadu. Vaallantha ichukoleru. Vaalla moolana veellaki kuda ibbandi. Ade route lo road veyyaka mundu nelaki 3k adde unde illu roaddesina ventane 8k ayyindi. Kaaranam again mana s/w. ante s/w ollu adigithe ichestaarani kaadu… mana Andhra lo nammakamentante s/w ante dabbu… dabbe dabbu. Adi “satyam” kaaduro ani mothukunesariki kompalu munigaayi.
Naaku telsu chetha la undani…. Marinaakappudu ee chethanthaa gurtoche inkaa chethala anipinchindi.

Sidhivinayak tarvatha mahalakshmi temple…. Ikkada kuda vyaparam undi kaani mare anthala meeda padi mare dochukotledu. Ee temple lo o trickkundi. Edaina rupee coin godaki petti korika korukuni vadilesthe…adi aa godakantukunte mana korika teeruddanta. Nenu chusanu kuda akkada goda meeda konni coins athukuni unnayi. Athukovadam ante jeevithaantam avalaage undipovu… eppudo padataayi kaani athukodam matuku athukuntunnayi. Sarle manam kuda try cheddamanukuni…. Asala coin ala godaki nokki petti teesaanu…. AASCHARYAM !!! adi athukkundi. Kaani nenu emi korukoledu. Emmari subconscious ga ala godaki coin athukovalani korukunnanemo.
Bayatakochetappudu “sankata mochan..” ani devudi peru raasi gudi kattaru… malla naa nippantindi.
Aa rojanthaa ala fire fighting chesi chesi ………naa bonda…. inkaa roju edo oka nippantukuntune undi.

Ila nippula meeda roju naalukkilometerlu nadipinchesi painunchi mana hero garu o tega navveskuntunnaru. Enthelaa ante….. enimidi nella kritam nenu bench meedunnappudu... O project vasthe naaku HYD vellalani undi so nenikkada pani cheyyanani maaram chesaanu. Aa project manager ki nippulu challadam hobby yemo mari… Maa HR daggara o nippuravvesaadu. Pillodu ikkada pani cheyyanani pechi pedutunnadu chusko o saari ani. Ee HR landaru roju poddunne iravainaalugu porala make-up kottukuni vachesi. Tega singaaralu vayyaraalu potu paavuganta sepu pani chesinattu natinchesi vellipotuntaaru. Maa HR naatho chaala style ga aruvu techukunna management English padaalanni kalipesi o aidu nimushaalu allipinchesi…aa manager nee meeda refusal log chesadu andukani o letter istaanu daani meeda santhakam petti ivvi anesi poyindi. Daanikelaagu aa taravatha nimusham nunchi ee vishayam gurtundadu. Evari daarilo vaallu vellipoyaam. Letter ledu tokka ledu. Malla monna mari em gurtochindo sannasi ki, fone chesi appudu letter ichanu kada kaani adi nee personal file lo ledu andukani oka past dated letter istaanu daani meeda santhakam petti ivvu andi. Ila moham meeda abaddaladesavaallani mohammeede dabhi dabhimani naalugguddalanipistundi. Adi nijamgaane papam marchipoyindaa anukundaam ante…. Mareee naa okkadi lettere ela miss avutundi ? Yehe asala letter miss avvadam enti letter ye lekapothe….edaina sign chesthe naaku telustundi kada, rojuko laksha documents emi sign cheyyanu kada.
Ee rakanga inka enno rakaalaga inka poorvajanma lo kuda pending undipoyina nippulanni tavvi teesi maree naa daarlo postunnadu.

Laabham ledu eskomanu nippulu….aayana nippuleskunte nenu cheppuleskuntaanu.